Looking forward
I remember when 40 was old and uncool. I was a teenager and my parents seemed stodgy and boring. So now that I’m 40, how do I measure up? Our generation has managed to push out the definition of old age farther out than 40, but I feel officially ‘not young.’ I’ve still struggled with the beginning of the midlife crisis. So what does being 40 mean to GenX?
There’s some pride in survival and a few accomplishments to date. A comfort in my own skin and self-acceptance I didn’t have at 20. A little softer in opinion, a little wiser about the world, a little saggier and wrinklier and squishier. There’s both more to worry about and less to worry about when you’re 40. I don’t worry about what others think, but I do get concerned about community and global things.
Now I’m not saying that I’ve lost my optimism. I was never optimistic, Xers tend to be realists. But I have grown more optimistic about what my children can do. And what God can do. And on days when I feel very weak and insignificant, I try to remember the dreams I held for the future when I was 20 and looking ahead, because the future is finally RIGHT NOW.
I now have the experience, money, health and opportunity to do all those things I dreamed about so long ago. The larger question is… do I still want what was on the list? Or do I now have different goals?
I do know that it’s only mid-life. There’s still half of a life left after the birthday cake and the accompanying feelings of panic and crisis. All we’ve done so far is the beginning of what’s next. We can have fun, love a great deal and make a bit of a difference in the next 40 years. We might be un-young, but we can still be GenX cool.
Musical pairing: “Right Here, Right Now,” Jesus Jones, 1990.
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